Monday Morning Fight Club

Battle of the Knee-high Turds.

Hi folks this week on Monday Morning Fight Club, a reader submitted midget matchup. Facing off are two champions of 80s child acting, Emmanuel Lewis and Gary Coleman. Now, we've done midgets before so I think we are going to have to mix it up a bit this time. At the last minute before these two losers face-off we are going to throw in 1 more surprise contestant. It could be anybody, so both of these douches could be laid to waste. The question is, who do you think will take less of a pounding, Webster or Arnold?

Jordan, I have to go with Gary Coleman on this one. Not only did he have a better tag line, but he also had more meat on his bones. I also think his post-acting career as a security guard has stretched his rage to the breaking point. I think years of watching himself on "where are they now" shows and trying to chase off drunk idiots will lead to a massive pit-bull like attack on poor little Emmanuel Lewis. Fuck it, who am I kidding, Webster is a puke, he was always trying to muscle in on Arnolds territory. I hope Gary Coleman messes him up good.

I have to agree with you on this one Craig. Coleman is built like a tiny brick shit-house, and seems to have the more aggressive personality besides, isn't he a security guard now or something? You know a guy that size would have to be tough to pull off that gig! ..whereas Webster is barely even memorable. He was short and thin! Now he seems Short and pudgy. I don't think this fight will go more than one round...I just can't see it.