Battle of the Hard Sweaty Women
Jordan, we have our first two official female combatants this week on Monday Morning Fight Club. I mean I don't think you can count Prince Adam or Johnny 5, although it is definitely debatable. In one camp we have Ripley supreme ass kicker of all things Alien, in the other corner we have the equally hard, sweaty and badass Sarah Connor from Terminator 2. I very much doubt there will be any checking of makeup before this fight. Both combatants have reputations as being hard nosed ball busting ass kicking machines. This is going to be a tough one to call, both combatants definitely come ready for a fight. Sarah Connor has been victorious over several robot made robot killing machines?? While Ripley has killed an innumerable amount of possibly genetically engineered killer aliens, including the Momma of them all. In the end, I think the day will go to Ripley. My reason, simple. Sarah Connor has tried over and over to save her son John Connor. Ripley on the other hand only ever had one child, an Alien/human abomination mix, which she did not hesitate to discharge into the void of space. She is definitely hardcore and I think after a solid fight she will end up box stomping Sarah Connor.
Well Craig,they won't be checking their make up because this fight could be called "Battle of the man-hating bull-dykes "or "Battle of the straight up mean-looking bitches". On the one hand we have Ellen Ripley, mini afro wearing, heavy sleeping, wife beater and panty wearing, Alien hater. And on the other hand we have Sarah Connor, once permed, often crying single mom, Luddite, insane asylum resident. Ripley wakes up after taking an unexpected hyper-nap that lasted 57 years and is put right back in the shit along with a handful of colonial marines on a "Bug Hunt". Her only skills at this point were looking sad and operating a fancy "loader" but thanks to the careful tutelage of Cpl. Dwayne Hicks, she learns how to fire a gun and ends up kicking some serious alien ass. Sarah Connor, however was a Perm-having party girl/waitress who, after being stalked by a mechanical/Austrian killing machine, is taught how to fire a gun by a remarkably familiar looking Kyle Reese, time traveling nudist/soldier. To me, both these ladies have been similarly trained...by similar looking men therefore their skills should be about equal. Ripley may have a more impressive ass-kicking record, however never discount the shear aggressiveness of a crazy person. I have a feeling that Sarah Conner will be watching Ripley give her the molten "thumbs up".
I cannot imagine Sarah will win this fight though, sure she was tough enough in her first encounter with the big bad metal machine - but after that she had a terminator bodyguard, something Ripley would have scoffed at.
ReplyDeleteRipley is all about taking on the nasties alone, and while I do think Sarah will put up a good fight, I still think Ripley will be victorious.
I'm excited to see this fight at ring-side!
I have to agree with Craig on this one. Ripley has a record of kicking ass and suceeding at it. She has knocked off numerous aliens where Sarah has needed help with only 2 terminators. In the end Ripley destroyed an entire species, Sarah failed and allowed human kind to be destroyed. Keep in mind as well, Ripley has come back from the dead, so can she even be put down permanently?
ReplyDeleteWhere is the Play-by-Play?? It's the last day of the work week and I expect to be entertained.
ReplyDeleteEntertain me damnit!